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Darth Yuri - a Star Wars story.
Follow the rise and fall of Darth Yuri, the fallen Jedi, through the war-ridden galaxy far, far away... Now, look at your monitor from below and start pacing backwards...
About this creation
Fig-Fax Yuri was a mediocre Jedi consular working for the Council.
He was known for mounting his lightsaber on top of a Force Pike to make up for his lack of physical prowess.
As a padawan, he often lost contact with the Force for short periods without an apparent reason, and as a Jedi Knight he often strayed, brushing with the Dark Side.


After one of the most severe of these occurrences, he was sent to a disciplinary hearing before a few members of the Jedi Council: Master Mace Windu, Master Yoda and Master Shifu Leo J.
It was only a trivial matter, and it would have ended with a long preach and a warning, but Fig-Fax was still "under the influence"...


... so he told master Yoda "If you don't like the way I work, you can kiss MY dark side!"
He was banned from the Order without appeal.

In his defense, the very next decision the Council made was: "We don't trust Palpatine and we fear Skywalker is straying... let's humiliate the kid and put them together, see what happens", so as you see the Council decision process may have been all but flawless at the time.

Ironically, after a few days of brooding, he left Coruscant only a few hours before Order 66 was issued.
In spite of the Council, he renamed his ship "Sith Viper" and started calling himself Darth Yuri. He never changed it to the end of his days.


-

At first he sought refuge in Tatooine, a planet so crappy that most other refugees didn't even bother changing their name, seen how unlikely it was to see the Empire anywhere near the system.


Yet evntually, a Grumorran bounty hunter (a smarter side-evolution of the Gamorreans), whom he usually beat at cards, brought some 501st troopers on his trail.


His fame as a Knight was pretty low, as we said, so they thought to take him on.


Well, for how much low his fame was before the Purge, he still was a Jedi Knight, as they had the displeasure to find themselves.


However, this ultimately led more unwanted guests on his trail, until while sharing a few with some acquaintances in a cantina, his worst fear came true.


F***ing Darth Vader found him!
Of course his chances against Vader were thinner than ice on Tatooine, but if there was a thing in which Darth Yuri excelled was getting out of trouble.


He sprung up the counter, sneered at Darth Vader and said: "Hey Anakin, I'm on high ground! You might as well surrender now!"


Vader was caught in such a fit of rage that his life support malfunctioned from Force pressure, and he couldn't breathe properly.
Darth Yuri used these spare seconds to make his exit. Belive it or not, in a few minutes he wasn't even near the system.


The other customers learned that you don't laugh at a Sith Lord's back.


-

He journeyed to Korriban to seek out the secrets of the Sith, convinced that the Dak Side and the Light Side could be used together to avoid the drawbacks brought by using each side alone...


... in fact, while the Dark Side turns quickly the user into a sadistic evil warlord, the Light Side slowly turns users into apathic, traditionalist fools.


He landed on Korriban confident he could succeed.


He used the Sith Viper's tail, which could turn into a speeder bike, to explore the planet. It took him years to master the secrets of the Sith.


Of course he had to journey often abroad for provisions.
During this period, he also met his wife while visiting a market in a nearby system.


He said to her that he was only trying out the sensitivity of his new artificial hand, and he maintaind that version for all his life, even if there's no record of Darth Yuri ever losing a limb.


He spent most of that period trying without success to use both sides of the Force together, but the only thing he could achieve was to be able to "switch" from one another at will.
At length, with his son Fig-Gone Wind he founded the Mixed Force Academy.


The MFA had never many students, because the basic requrement was a light-headed personality, which was the only reason why neither side of the Force ever got a firm hold on Darth Yuri in the first place.


Sadly, his son was tangled in the Dark Side, and went off on his own, eventually dying in some forgotten duel with the name of Darth Gale.


-

Years later, Darth Vader tracked him down to Korriban, and went out with 3 heavy gunships to deal with the fallen Jedi who humiliated him.


But by that time, Darth Yuri had fortified his position, and deployed a very old, but still functional Droid Carrier to protect the Academy.
The only communication he sent was: "I want nothing to do with you, your Emperor, the Sith, the Jedi or whomever you can think of. Leave me alone."
It's said this happened shortly after his son had left, hence the bitterness.


Vader's squadron was forced to withdraw, and Darth Vader would have shortly returned with greater forces, if some old family issues hadn't finally caught up with him.


-

Darth Yuri never achieved his goal, he never went beyond the skill of switching sides.
Of all his school, only one was capable of using both sides at once, in his time: Kobe-Wan the Force Lord, as he would in later times be known.


Eventually, Darth Yuri severed his tie with the Force, in order to, by his words, "live off my waning years untroubled with the future and the far places".


He died at 167, for the complications of food poisoning caused by a not-so-fresh bantha pudding.
His droid doctor said that there was no trace of regret in his last farewell to life, though the exact words were never divulged.



THE END








Well, this was a long page, and I hope you took the time to go through it.
My next post will be a "special feature" with all the vehicles and stuff used to make this "short" story.


Note
I love the old trilogy near as much as I despise the new one. A unique universe, full of mistery and wonder, was butchered just to make some cash.
Among the things I can't stand, there's Yoda turning from a Zen master with enormous powers and wisdom to a senile Kung-Fu monk, and the fall of the Force which isn't an all-encopassing supreme power anymore, but the byproduct of microscopic parasites (yes, they're parasites. If there are ill side effects it's not symbiosis, it's parasitism).
And continuity can go to hell with all the rest.



Comments are welcome :)



Comments

  May 26, 2011
Good story, I like the ship as well.
 I like it 
  April 4, 2011
Why am I just now seeing this? Very funnny stuff. Yeah, I'm not a big fan of "Phantom Moneygrab" or "Clonemethemoney", but "Revenge of Sith" wasn't entirely horrible. I do like the originl three well enough, but I'm more of a Trek fan than anything (and not a big fan of that, either). Great builds, good story!
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  February 14, 2011
Haha this was great, so all it took was a little bantha pudding to put him out huh? I would have gone with the Tusken Doughnuts.
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  December 28, 2010
be assured that i took my time to read and enjoy the whole page! it's very well done, thanks for this entertainment!!
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  December 15, 2010
Calling Judge Yuri! Hope you have time to judge on the Ultimate Toa of Air Contest, sorry for the wait! :D
 I like it 
  December 14, 2010
Kiss my dark side. Hilarious!
 I like it 
  December 11, 2010
belli i personaggi le scene e' l'astronave ma il tizio con la flebo non lo supera nessuno....bravo
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  December 7, 2010
Nice, I usually don't read stories here but that flash on the beginning made me do it. And I didn't regret it. ;)
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  December 5, 2010
Way better than them "kewl sw story plz r8 an coment" with the "This iz frum th episod were (name here) dies in da clon wars" introduction. And great build! The last part with the giant battle station and Vader's tiny gunships was hilarious.
 I like it 
  December 5, 2010
Best....Lego Star Wars....Story....EVAH! I couldn't comment on this at first due to computer complications but I'm so happy I got around to it. I love the "high ground" part. Can't wait for the special post with the vehicles and such.
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  December 5, 2010
Hilarious~H
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  December 4, 2010
Lots of nice little details in the build Yuri, but everyone knows i'm a sucker for humour and dubious humour at that. Mooning the council and Kobe-wan = brilliance. Keep it up.
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  December 4, 2010
Haha. really funny :)
 I made it 
  December 4, 2010
Quoting Sebeus I Nicely done, so Yuri is a holder of a jedi staf, or should I say pole :P nice spacecrafts
Ooops! It's supposed to be mouted on a Force Pike, to make up for his lack of physical prowess. I forgot to mention that. I'll add it now.
Quoting Hank Hansen the six months of wait was worth it great story and characters with a a lot of references to the original trilogy.
Thanks. I wanted to add links to Wookiepedia for each reference, but strangely the pages of Wookiepedia stopped loading after the first few.
Quoting Mike Johnson On the bright side though at least we can now get all of those S.W. sets and create something worthwhile (like this) out of them!
I only bought 1 SW set ever: the Clone troopers battle pack. That's why there are only "unofficial" aliens :)
Quoting El Barto ! Mmmmm, Bantha pudding! It goes really well with a nice juicy Ewok burger. But you can't leave that stuff out on the counter for too long, or it'll turn on you... Great story, Dude!
Yeah, it's sort of an aquired taste, I guess.
Quoting Pascal Schmidt Lol. The dark side seems to have a bit of a Blacktron III color scheme going on. :-)
Black and neon is my favourite scheme ever :)
Quoting Ken ... Great job! My favorite part was when Darth Yuri hopped up on the bar. And about the new trilogy, I thought George Lucas planned the entire Star Wars saga to go like that. Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.
Just follow the link on Darth Vader's name and you'll have your answer.
Yuri  Fassio
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Pascal Schmidt
  December 3, 2010
Lol. The dark side seems to have a bit of a Blacktron III color scheme going on. :-)
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Loaded with goodness!
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Awesome story, and interesting thoughts about mastering both sides of the force... Also, I have to say, Darth Yuri's space base looks amazing =0
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Finally! Darth Yuri has arrived! and lol Kobe-Wan
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
awesome story man, really cool and has some funny moments too. mind checking out my new mocs if you can please.
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Kobe-Wan FTW!
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  December 3, 2010
great story, i definitely liked the "high ground" reference. i enjoy the entire star wars saga, but what i can't stand is the new clone wars cartoons
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Hahaha! Nice work, great work on the story and the builds!
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Haha, 'I have the high ground Anakin'. I don't dislike the new trilogy as much as some people, but they certainly don't match the original three. Oh yeah, back to the review. Great scenes, vehicles, and story!
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Great stuff Yuri! Love how the customers learned their lesson at the cantina, had me laughing out loud. The last set is my fav, with Darth Yuri in his bed with the life support system and drip etc. Very cool!
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
I couldn't stop laughing! The "I have the high ground" bit was a personal fav. Excellent work my friend and glad to see you finally got it posted! Thanks for sharing! ~ Chris.
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Hehe! XD
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  December 3, 2010
EPIC STORY!! Vader never gets his way, poor guy...
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  December 3, 2010
"One does not fully understand the power of the dark side until one first witness the dark hole." - Master Shifu Leo J's disillusioned words uttered from an undisclosed intergalactic mental ward while grilling a slab of bacon with his light saber ... AHAHAHAHAHAH! The story is freakin' hilarious! I gotta try that fake artificial hand trick. XD
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Mmmmm, Bantha pudding! It goes really well with a nice juicy Ewok burger. But you can't leave that stuff out on the counter for too long, or it'll turn on you... Great story, Dude!
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Kobe-Wan looks high... ~Waff
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
OK, I have to come out of exile once again to type the following: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! BrillianT with a capital T. Kobe-Wan.....
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Great job! My favorite part was when Darth Yuri hopped up on the bar. And about the new trilogy, I thought George Lucas planned the entire Star Wars saga to go like that. Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
The Force is strong with this one! I absolutely love the scenes where Yuri moons the Jedi Council and the beheading scene. There's some great humor in here, especially the malfunctioning robot hand to meet his future wife.:) Great stuff!
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  December 3, 2010
An absolutely fabulous story and for sure better than the new trilogy. You opened totally new views on the darkside (well, at least for the council members). The beheading of the troopers is my favourite pic. ItÂīs dynamic and believable.
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Absolutely smashing my friend! Darth Yuri's lucky he didn't get a light saber colonoscopy for that stunt with the council. In fact if anyone deserves a Death Star sized enema it's Lucas. On the bright side though at least we can now get all of those S.W. sets and create something worthwhile (like this) out of them!
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
the six months of wait was worth it great story and characters with a a lot of references to the original trilogy.
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Nicely done, so Yuri is a holder of a jedi staf, or should I say pole :P nice spacecrafts
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Great build! The wall on the Tatooine build is a great design and the bar scenes are very clever. That is one big IV, by the way. And I agree wholeheartedly. It is a sad day when something good and beautiful is destroyed for the sake of money. ::sigh:: Once again, great build! Keep 'em coming!
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  December 3, 2010
Very good build. I like the Darth Vader tantrum, seems like old anniew. Good job! Cheers!~Swift
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  December 3, 2010
Heh, Shifu WOULD be on the Jedi Council. Good thing Jedi aren't vegitarians.
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  December 3, 2010
Oh, and when Yuri flashed the Jedi Council, all I could think of was, "That's no moon!" Yeah, gotta love cheesy Star Wars humor.
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  December 3, 2010
Some cool stuff here. I like the bed sheet over the guy. That looks pretty good.
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  December 3, 2010
A self-styled sith who can't manage more than insulting people and escaping alive? Amazing. While I enjoyed the whole thing, Kobe-Wan really got me. Great story, I really loved it.
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  December 3, 2010
Excellent! I really like it. It was interesting to read it. Good work! 5/5
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  December 3, 2010
Wow, that's a lot of reading. Very funny though, really well done. But killed by pudding? That's blasphemy! XD I also agree with you about the Force, they shouldn't have given it an explanation of how it works (especially such a bad one).
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  December 3, 2010
Kobi-wan.... Pure genious! :D
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  December 3, 2010
Very nice story.
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
hehe, darth Yuri! That's out there dude, interesting that you went all the way to the death bed 100 years after the story, that's some trippy shut...
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
Nice. I ought to do something similar with Fig-Gringat... meh. I'M ON HIGH GROUND! >:D
 I like it 
  December 3, 2010
LOL - I have to agree with the Jedi Council about expelling ya :P
 
By Yuri Fassio
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LEGO models my own creation MOCpages toys shop Darth Yuri - a Star Wars story.Star Wars


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