Don't worry, she's a WHOLE lot better than last time :D Anyway, here is the 3rd last member of Lotem I will post... Dewan :D After this it's Arvach :) Anyway, enjoy!
About this creation
"The ocean shelters me, heals me... and obeys me."
Title(s): Toa, sister, ‘That Chick With the Gun’
Mask: Kanohi Faxon
Weapon(s): Large Gunblade (Greeble 2000)
Story: Dewan was an extremely smart Matoran, who was the smartest in her village and was always studying. Whenever she wasn’t she was teaching younger Matoran and sometimes even Toa on things like history or even how to fight! When Toa Hahli was sent to guard Dewan's village she took great interest in Dewan, she realised that she would make an excellent Toa with her knowledge! Hahli offered Dewan a Toa stone, but she took no interest in being a Toa, she was happy as she was, but Hahli persisted for days, weeks, until Dewan gave in. Hahli trained Dewan until she became a powerful and smart Toa. Dewan and Hahli became great friends, but Hahli was assigned to an important mission and Dewan was forced to guard her old city, in this time she was sent to Le-Koro to put out a Bush fire, little did she know she would be meeting a Makuta there and would also have to defeat him! She and two other Toa did, and they were hailed as heroes! Dewan and Furven’s (One of the Toa who helped stop the Makuta) Were later assigned to join The Toa Lotem.
Here she is better than ever after all her upgrades :D You like?
A back shot :) By the way, credit to Adam Toh for the torso design :D I did change it a bit though ;)
Her new feet, a lot better than last time, last time they were...horrible.
Her legs :D
Her upper legs :)
Her skirt, I'm pleased with how this turned out!
The back of her legs.
The back of her skirt, where oddly enough there is no skirt 0.o
Her chest now with a heartlight :)
Her back, I'm pleased with how this part turned out :D
Her mask and upper body.
Her hair, I'm pleased with this part :) You like it?
Her shoulders, I love Nuva shoulders so much :]
Her lower arms.
Her gun known as the GreebleGun for obvious reasons, Credit to Adam Toh for this ;)
Another look at it :)
Dewan: Behold my power!
Cute/girly/shy/can't think of a word to describe it pose :]
Getting ready to shoot :)
Cossy with Dewan :D Also sadly no "Everyone I've posted so far shot" because Furven's is begin revamped :)
Size comparison with Ackar :D
Dewan: See ya!
Well that's all for now! Hope you liked her :D Soon I'm post Arvach :D
Thanks for viewing!
Don't forget to rate and comment!
Till next time ;)
Cute, this is a cute moc. The only thing that could've been improved is that maybe she could have a rahkshi head, but that is my opinion. I just love rahkshi heads, but i LOVE how the faxon fits in. Great work.....as usual.
Fantastic!I must warn you though, You're a member of my group Bionicle 2012,and I wish that you stay active and contribute ideas and not only creations.I'm cleaning up the group and if you do not respond to this message,I'm afraid You will be removed.This is a warning.
November 5, 2011
Like I said good work here.And thanks for responding,I'll keep you on the list.
That is a lot better than the original!! Would you mind looking at this http://www.mocpages.com/moc.php/291234 I really hate asking for comments but this is my first bionicle posted on mocpages. I've been building with them since they came out.
October 14, 2011
well, I haven't commented yet so. I give it a three. I like the MOC, but there's also something that I don't like. The skirt is fantastic so that should be kept. however, the arms really don't look that great. I wouldn't horrible though. But what really bugs me is the hair. I tried using that piece for Larillia when she was first being created, but I couldn't stand the look of it. You don't have to change it of course. Also, she always looks like she's slouching around her neck. It just doesn't seem to add up.
Thanks guys! Cheers Popcorn! Oh well, get better soon ;) I see Pho, ok, my next project will be back up to the right leave, I promise ;) I'll take a look Nick :) That's a bit harsh A.D, maybe some advice to improving it would be nice please. Thanks Brickprime! Thanks Red-Eye and Cyborg! Thanks Galaxus, yeah, I might find a replacement for that!
Guess who's baaaaack??? Awesome job here! The feet and torso are awesome! So is everything else! However, about the lower arms. That piece is under a lot of stress, it may not break but... OUCH! That's all I have to say for now :)
great build Cossy, Just as a suggestion maybe you could put the front part of the skirt onto the back to make it look more ninja. Also could you please check out my new self moc, Toa Magnum, He's a significant upgrade of korra. ~ Nick
Ya know i love the concept but it feels like your falling in that rut again where your mocs just aren't as complex as i'd expect. The legs are very basic. love the feet. The body up to your high standard but where it really fell flat was the arms. just very simple not much too them and overall just not the greatest aesthetically wise. I know i'm being very critical but I think this could be something great and right now it's just average. Hope you don't take this the wrong way.
Very nice, Ben, very nice. I really like her colors and all. She looks LOADS better than before. Sadly, I don't feel like writing a long comment today. My sis is sick and I think I'm getting a cold. So I'm not feeling the best. I really like her gun, and her feet are spectacular. Great job!!!
Thanks guys! Oh well cheers Jensen! That means a lot :) Wait what are you saying Ben? Cheers Gringat! Those are the kinda comment I freaking love! I'll totally take your advice on hand ;) It's a new MOC Windedge :) Sounds cool Nick! Thanks Grievous and L! Thanks Cody! I'll take your advice on hand! Well Iceman, thank you for your advice, however, like Adam said not all MOC's need that kinda look, still, I will totally use your advice on later Female MOC's. Thank you Crazy! You advice is always the best! I'm glad you like her, I'll totally follow your advice mate ;) Thanks Legofreak! Thanks Kenaz! That means a lot, ok, I'll change her, thanks ;) Thanks a bunch Connor! I will totally follow your advice (not just for her, but for future MOC's :D) Thanks Adam! Thanks Ware Wolf! Thanks Vored! That's some great advice! I'll take it on hand ;) Thanks everyone else ;)
Great Toa of water! Even in her size, you make her look very female, and the proportions were very well made. I also like her skirt-thingy! As always, you gave her a nice color sheme. The only thing I doN't like is the neck connection, which makes her head stick out too far. But still gets 5/5!
ok, I got to say, this is AMAZING! those feet r brilliant! the whole thing is awesome! keep it up!
I like it
October 4, 2011
very cool! i love the weapon and the skirt was a nice touch!
I like it
October 4, 2011
MUCH better then last time. Especially the feet.
I like it
October 4, 2011
Awesome, the body could be a little more stream-like but it is still awesome, and a lot better than before. (the old feet where kinda...yeah...)
I like it
October 4, 2011
Excellent work, again Ben!!! I love the skirt and hair, definitly a female at first sight! Wow, you continually amaze me!!! I've added a bunch of new stuff, if you could look at them?
Thanks for EVERYTHING!!! ;)
I actually really like the torso! :P Much better than your last one, but I feel the limbs are severely lacking. One thing I've learned form the 2 female MOCs I've built, is that you need to keep a good balance between the amount of armor on the limbs compared to the torso. Proportion is crucial, but anatomy (You know what I mean) doesn't really matter. (It only does if you can make it work.) What I would do is either beef up the limbs or slim down the body. Other than all that I think she looks fine. Also, I really like where the Nuva Shoulders are. If you do end up changing her, I'd like to see that remain on the MOC. :) That is all. XD
I agree somewhat with Glacies, she could use work, and she doesn't look as feminine as she could, and I think the gun is a. Too big and b. Impractical (I think that a water toa would want more 'smooth' weapons, you know?). I'm sorry if I sound like I don't like her. She's great, but with work, she could be fantastic.
Sweet! Not your best, but it's still nice. :) I think you should put some trans blue on the upper torso and arms, it looks a little uneven with the trans blue pieces on her legs and feet but not the rest of her. :) Can't wait for more bro. BTW, Happy MOCiversery! :D
Ahh...much better than your last version. She's been beefed up and greebled heavily, which I like, and I'm especially fond of the torso and the lower legs. However, I think this one still has the most room for improvement: as mentioned earlier, the thighs and open greeble sockets are a bit unattractive. Great job though, and I can't wait for Arvach!
Definitely not your best. She isn't very feminine at all. She has a lack of proper thighs. She also seems a little generic, just another personality-less water toa. She certainly needs work, but it can be easy to fix her up :D
Nice work! A few things though: The gun needs a longer stock; the socket greebles on her armor leave lots of odd little gaps, try filling those in; and her overall build isn't extremely feminine. Try exaggerating it with that hourglass figure. ;D
Very cool and MUCH better feet. The gun is pretty cool and I like the skirt. I do think that you should replace some silver with blue. Can't wait for Arvach. Compared to your first one with the Pohatu Nuva mask, well, he is much better. Wait a sec! Is Woodhammer a new or old moc? If old, then I know who it is... :)
Masterful, although a couple of tips might be to make the thighs more smooth in build than those loose pins, and maybe to move her neck joint back by half a stud or so. She looks a bit stooped the way she is. Otherwise, I have no complaints, the skirt is brilliant... and she looks disconcertingly like one of my MOC-off entries against you, but no matter!