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Talonmagic, The Tattooed Whirlwind
Sorry I havn't been posting lately, I've had such a bad MOCing block, I havn't had any fresh ideas. Here is the new edition of my Self-MOC, Talonmagic, his third verion!! I've also added a bit to his story, so watch out for that! I also need him to be my most popular, so any help with that is appreciated. Enjoi!!
About this creation
Oh, here is his bio
Name: Talonmagic
Gender: Male
Species: Le-matoran
Element: Air
Title(s): Talonmagic, Talon, brother, airhead, leader
Mask: Kanohi Ulahi, mask of mind manipulation: allows user to control, read, or place thoughts in another mind
Weapon(s): Laser shooting battle axe, twin daggers
Story: As a matoran, Talonmagic adored two things: knowledge and Toa!! Every day he was either reading a book or watching Toa spare. He dreamed of one day becoming a Toa, and ridding aqua magna of the makuta!! Because of this, Talon was often thought of as a silly bookworm daydreamer, and was often made fun of.

One day while Talon was reading a book on an irrelevant topic, he heard screams of
terror outside his hut. When he went outside to see what the problem was, he saw many buildings ablaze and, in the middle of it all, a makuta of fire. His village was under attack!! Most of the matoran sentries were already on the ground dead, and since Talon didnít see a toa in site, he decided to try and defeat this immense monster with what knowledge he had. He frantically looked around for weapons, and then he saw a matoran- sized battle axe, and a lazer gun. He strapped the two together with vines, and made his first weapon ever. He thought back to a book he had once read on battle. He reviewed the strategies and terms in his mind, and then fired a lazer bolt at the makuta. The makuta barely flinched on impact, and then looked in Talonís direction. He began whooping with laughter, but then started screaming in agony when he found a matoran axe blade in his face. He then looked at Talonmagic with an evil glare, for half of his face was taken off by the axe. Then, he swung his giant club at Talon, who in turn jumped away nimbly. The two brawled for awhile, until Talon rose victorious over the mutilated makuta, who now lay on the ground in several pieces. Talon was quite beat up, and since most of his village was pillaged, he started to limp to the next village.

When he arrived at the next village, he collapsed on the medicís door unconscious, not able to go on. When the medic found him lying nearly dead in his doorway, he immediately started patching him up, and took him to the elders of the village. When Talon finally regained consciousness, he found himself surrounded by old turaga, who were conversing with each. When they saw that he was awake, they asked him where he had come from, and how he had gotten so beat up. He told them about the battle with the makuta, and how he had beaten the gigantic beast. They were appalled that a little scrawny bookworm matoran had taken down a giant makuta. Clearly he was gifted with some unnatural power, so they gave him the one toa stone that they had, which then turned the little matoran into a giant and powerful toa!!

Talonmagic was then enlisted to the toa order. After news of his battle reached the counsel, he was immediately accepted into the order. As weapons, he was given a laser shooting battle axe (upon request),and twin daggers. With these weapons and his newly found air powers, he quickly flew through the ranks of the toa, so much to where the point he became the leader of many toa teams.

After the formation of spherus magna, Talonmagic began ridding the planet of the remnants of the makuta, until the crisis of Valki nui. He was then enlisted to become the leader of the Toa valki, and elite team of toa. He accepted, and became a fierce and powerful leader. He led the team into various wars and battles against the new brotherhood, one in which he was unexpectedly captured. They took him back to their citadel, and locked him up in a shadow cage. A shadow cage is a special type of cage, one that sucks the life force from an organism, and replaces it with pure shadow. Once the life force is completely drained from an organism, it becomes a shadow of what it once was, wondering the planet without purpose or mind. For 10 bitter years Talon suffered in the cage, starving and nearly insane. Eventually, agents of the OoMN were able to penetrate the citadel. They found and rescued Talonmagic, along with several other prisoners, who were also OoMN agents.

They brought Talon back to their outpost not far from the citadel. He was in horrible shape. He looked like a skeleton with a thin layer of skin, as a result of starvation, and he was on the brink of losing his mind. Another thing was that the shadow had tattooed his skin a morbid black across most of his body. For another 15 years, skilled spellcasters and magicians from the OoMN slowly drained the shadow from Talon, although the black marks on his skin never dissapeard. After draining most of the shadow from Talon, Magicians probed Talon's mind, peiceing together what was left of his shattered conscience. This in of it self took many years, since it was such a complicated process. After they completed peiceing together Talon's conscience, they let his body regenerate, since after draining the shadow all that was left was empty space. For several months, Talon lie unconscious on a bed in the healing wing, lifeless, Until one day he opened his eyes, and sat up on the bed. He felt drained, yet refreshed. As he looked at the tattooes on his skin, he had realized what had happened. He asked the guards outside his room if he could see the leader of this particular outpost. They brought him in, and he explained to Talon how they had brought him back from the brink of death and insanity. Amazed, Talon thanked him. But before leaving, the leader of the outpost asked Talon if he would accept a position in the OoMN, since anyone that could survive a shadow cage must be a being with power beyond comprehension. After a few moments of thought, Talon declinced, explaining that he was the leader of a Toa team, the Valki Nui, and that he needed to get back to them after his many years of being away, although he did accept the leaders invitation to be his ally.

After Talon returned to Valki Nui, he was questioned much about what happened to him. He briefed everyone on what had happened, and they were all amazed. When asked about getting the tattooes on his skin removed, he immediately declined, say that they were a sign of power, and it would strike fear into the hearts of his enemies. In the wars to come, it did, and now Talon leads the Toa Valki into battle with his raging courage and power.













Talonmagic, The Tattooed Whirlwind


















How could Talon be Talon without his dual blades?.....






...Or his Laser shooting battle Axe?




Last version I didn't really express the Fact that his axe can shoot lasers, so see that little rod peice at the top of the axe?


You guessed it, that's the barrel of his gun!
*Pew* *Pew*




Talonmagic and Ulaya My Self-MOCs


The Toa Valki
Most of them have received some minor updates, so I'll show them to you now.


Ulaya, The Moonshadow
Still my Secondary-Self MOC Last time you saw him, he was a nasty four-legged insect. I didn't like it, and I'm sure you guys didn't either, which is why he's bipedial again. His page will be updated soon, so look out for that!






Dach, The Sonic Boom
He recieved minimal updates, just a few greebles here and there to take up space







Mongle, The Unstoppable Rush of the Elements
Fixed lower legs, since they were horribly ugly






Batix, The Pulse of Energy
New Lower arms, which are "Electrified Gauntlets"








One last shot of Talon


See yah!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And there you have it! Sorry to all those who liked the previous verision, that non-custom torso was driving me nuts. I didn't have enough light grey and silver peices to keep the earlier color scheme, so I had to change the whole color scheme. On the bright side, this is my first 100% custom MOC ever, and it's only fitting it's my self MOC! Hope you guys like him as much as I do, I really worked hard on him! Once Again, I need you guys to make it my most popular! Must exceed 40 Likes! Till Next time!!




Comments

  August 5, 2012
 I made it 
  August 3, 2012
Quoting Eric Schouten awesome!, i really like this moc and his backstory. i was wondering if i could make a chibi version of him...
No problem!
 I made it 
  August 3, 2012
Quoting Eric Schouten awesome!, i really like this moc and his backstory. i was wondering if i could make a chibi version of him...
No problem!
 I like it 
  August 3, 2012
awesome!, i really like this moc and his backstory. i was wondering if i could make a chibi version of him...
 I made it 
  July 30, 2012
Quoting Terilis the Dark Angel Talon, I am writing a story on Fanfiction, and it would be amazing if I could give Talonmagic an appearance, or pssibly a long-term role. If I may, that would be, excellent.
Ofcoarse!! If you give the link, I'll be your #1 fan as well!!
  July 30, 2012
Talon, I am writing a story on Fanfiction, and it would be amazing if I could give Talonmagic an appearance, or pssibly a long-term role. If I may, that would be, excellent.
 I like it 
  July 22, 2012
great moc
 I made it 
  July 21, 2012
Quoting Chronos Omega Poster is done. I'll upload it with some MOCs later this weekend.
Sweet! Can't wait!
  July 21, 2012
Poster is done. I'll upload it with some MOCs later this weekend.
 I like it 
  July 20, 2012
Alright, Talon; take a look at this. I watermarked it, hope you don't mind. If it's not what you had in mind, please let me know on one of my threads, Sir. Cheers~ -The Birdie http://www.mocpages.com/image_zoom.php?mocid=&id=/user_images/72031/1342826722m
 I made it 
  July 20, 2012
Quoting Arken . Hey Talon, can I call you Talon? Anyway, I was thinking of making Talonmagic. Do you mind? He is is going to be a Matoran. ~Arken
Ofcoarse u can call me Talon, lot easier than saying Talonmagic, although that is the full name, and Ofcoarse u can build talon!
Talonmagic ~
 I like it 
Arken .
  July 19, 2012
Hey Talon, can I call you Talon? Anyway, I was thinking of making Talonmagic. Do you mind? He is is going to be a Matoran. ~Arken
 I like it 
  July 17, 2012
Hello?? You read in Chat Between Friends?
 I made it 
  July 15, 2012
Thanks for all the feedback everyone! 9 more likes to go!
 I like it 
  July 14, 2012
Awesome! I love his arms and legs! great job here! The only thing that seems to bother me is that his head sticks a little to back (when you look at him from the side) and that neck seems to be a little too skinny. A tire there would do the trick.
 I like it 
  July 14, 2012
I have been trying to decide exactly how I feel about these updates... While it looks awesome and he looks now the "super slick ninja" type, I liked the old look more. I like the idea behind this build, (and the lovely execution of said idea) but I just think he looked better before. Fantastic work regardless!
 I made it 
  July 14, 2012
Thanks everyone! 11 more till most popular!!
 I like it 
  July 14, 2012
Amazing job!!!
Talonmagic ~
 I like it 
The Texan Bionicle Builder
  July 12, 2012
AWWWWW YEAH!!!! Loving it man! Maybe i should make him... ;)
 I made it 
  July 12, 2012
Quoting The Texan Bionicle Builder AWWWWW YEAH!!!! Loving it man! Maybe i should make him... ;)
That would be very cool! U can if u want, and thank you!
 I like it 
  July 11, 2012
sick moc dude! awesome body design love the axe yo!
 I made it 
  July 11, 2012
Quoting Vorred 03 He received some huge changes, but I still like him! He is less bulky now, but I really like his new legs and the torso, it gives him a very cool, clean and sleek look! I somehow never saw that his old torso wasn't custom, or do you meant the torso plate? Anyway, fantastic upgrade!
Although his torso wasn't completely non custom, it had a ignika torso in the mix, which classified it as non custom
 I like it 
  July 11, 2012
He received some huge changes, but I still like him! He is less bulky now, but I really like his new legs and the torso, it gives him a very cool, clean and sleek look! I somehow never saw that his old torso wasn't custom, or do you meant the torso plate? Anyway, fantastic upgrade!
 I like it 
  July 11, 2012
Cool but it needs more green and more muscle but it is pretty good:-)
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
That is awesome! He looks a bit like this: http://www.mocpages.com/moc.php/324897
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
too much black and not enough buffness. but anyway great revamp!
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
Very nice, but there's just something about that's kinda bugging me about it. I'm not sure what though.
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
I did read the final disclaimer: that said - I DID prefer the former version, and don't think the Non-Custom Torso detracted from it. I still respect the Want to try new things, and respect your wishes to do so, nonetheless. It's slimmer as full-custom, but the armored areas (that were formerly present) lent more to that hardcore-and-battle-ready look, i.m.h.o. Nice innovations, tho - Cheers!
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
Sweet! Love the story and the new color scheme looks cool. The custom head seems a bit blocky and big though, and the arms seem a bit bulky compared to his legs. Aside from that, he's pretty awesome. ;)
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
Neat MOC, your Toa team looks pretty awesome as well.
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
All great mocs. One thing to work on is talons rather long neck. Might need a bit chopped off. Nice work
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
Awesome!
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
(Insert zelda discovery sound) WOW! Custom FTW! You are really good at this Talon. Your self-moc looks awesome, and the story was great. There is one thing I'd like to see though... Matoran Talon!
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
great job
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
Excellent work on the body, although I think the head connection needs some work to make it look more natural. Keep it up!
 I like it 
  July 10, 2012
Pretty awesome, The arms look to bulky though (metru armor is hard to use though) Besides that, I love the new torso!
 
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LEGO models my own creation MOCpages toys shop Talonmagic, The Tattooed Whirlwind


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