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Master Shifu's Peregrinations Volume 3 . . Master Shifu's latest adventure brings him to the Philippines. He is accompanied by his 'trusty' sidekick Papoot ... ... and a few stowaways. Giggles tried to cling to Hansi but was arrested by immigration officers. On the way to the first destination, Master Shifu stopped by a rest area to relieve himself in a "5 star restroom". --- On to the lowlands --- Baa, baa, black sheep, have you any wool? I'm a goat, Einstein! Chicks! Mr. Water Buffalo does not look happy getting his picture taken. Come to papa! Oooohhh! Master Shifu just got mooned! Frog ... tastes like chicken ... where's McDonald's when you need some grub? Ah, Big Mak! Wait ... I smell a lawsuit. What?!? McDonald's serves rice? Stock motorized tricycle. Modified tricycle fitted with sidecar rear wing spoiler and fog lights. Custom-made tricycle with a lawnmower engine, motorcycle transmission, automatic car transmission lever, and bicycle drum brakes --- basically a disaster waiting to happen. Passenger jeepney. --- On to the Tatin's Resort --- Dude, you need some major dental work. What's with the cawwot, Doc? Master Shifu is just a few inches to paradise ... A freaky genie. Move over Snow White, it's Master Shifu and the seven dwarves ... or is it Snow White, seven dwarves, and a midget? Never mind ... Let's do the wave! Wait, where are the bouncies? Starting the binge with Manila Light beer ... ... and finishing it off with an 80 proof sugar cane alcohol. --- On to the mountains --- A School of Hard Knocks kind of establishment. Checking in ... Peckers! Not listed is the Kiwi-style Bone Massage. Hansi with a native pipe. Phippy: "A carrot made of wood ... heaven!" --- Cemetery of Negativism --- If you wanna ride, you ride a white horse. We interrupt this program with Heath's "Did You Know?" segment. --- Hanging Out with the Natives --- Restroom signs. Partay! The original Master Shifu! Did somebody say, "Attention!"? Master Shifu: "Yo Papoot, come over here." Master Shifu: "Do you see what I see?" Papoot: "Ee chee wa maa! Ekla jarat sleesh!" Papoot: "Yupyup!" A sundial. Damn you, Robert Anthony! --- Relics of WWII --- Meanwhile back in the Mile Hi Inn, Phippy's going for some horned beetle action. Ooohhh! Now that's horny! Bad beetle! Bad beetle! What happened to the pig that mooned Master Shifu? It got thrown in the fire pit ... Lechon! No souvenir shop sold a Bonesy-in-a-shot-glass, but in keeping with the bone spirit, Master Shifu presents ... ... Mr. and Mrs. Barrel! SCHWING! THE END


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