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Hamlet Rap . MIT Round 1 Master Shifu vs Raviel Ze Mocist! An entry for the 2012 MIT, Round 1 . Opponent: Raviel Ze Mocist! Link back to the 2012 MIT Category: "Telivishun is gooder then reeding! Take your favorite book or classic piece of literature and turn it in to a modern television show. It can be a sitcom, reality show, soap opera, cop-drama...whatever you want!" ... er, SNOT and SNARL would like to do Rap-umentary/music video live on location ... with guest rapper, ahem, Hamlet ... Here goes nothing ... HIT IT! SNOT: Hey, yo, Hamlet! SNARL: What's your worry? HAMLET: My uncle killed my dad and (bleep) my mommy. SNOT: That is insane! SNARL: Does it drive you looney? HAMLET: To the "to", to the "be", "or" to the "not to be". SNOT: Now, Ophelia, your love! SNARL: Are you getting some nookie? HAMLET: The girl's so demure I'd be happy with a hickie. SNOT: She tried to win your love. SNARL: But why did you go batty? HAMLET: I told her to get lost, "get thee to a nunnery". SNOT: The proof is in the pudding. SNARL: What did your uncle see? HAMLET: The Murder of Gonzago, oh, he's so guilty. SNOT: Polonius tried to eavesdrop. SNARL: When you chat with your mommy? HAMLET: He hid behind the curtains, so I slayed his fanny. SNOT: Your uncle thinks your mad. SNARL: Did he wanna get rid of thee? HAMLET: He sent me to England with my two buddies. SNOT: It's Rosencrantz and Guildenstern. SNARL: Were they bad company? HAMLET: Sent them to their deaths 'coz they're no good to me. SNOT: Laertes cannot believe it. SNARL: 'Coz Ophelia's now crazy? HAMLET: He blames me for his woes, what a (bleep)ing bully. SNOT: Ophelia had drowned. SNARL: Isn't that a pity? HAMLET: And now Laertes, in fencing, wants to challenge me. SNOT: So the clown digs a grave SNARL: And unearthed somebody? HAMLET: A boner of a skull from the past, a memory. SNOT: Y-Y-Y-Yorick was his name. SNARL: How could it possibly? HAMLET: "... a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy". SNOT: To the fight! To the fight! SNARL: What's your strategery? HAMLET: Ah, er, simple, beat his sorry booty. SNOT: He struck you first. SNARL: But why you look woozie? HAMLET: What a cheater's blade, that poisoned tip is deadly. SNOT: But you struck harder... SNARL: Wait, what's wrong with mommy? HAMLET: She drank the poisoned wine that was intended for me. SNOT: Slash that sucker! SNARL: Is that enough for Claudy? HAMLET: Let him drink his wine for a double whammy. SNOT: But Hamlet, you are dying. SNARL: Have you avenged your daddy? HAMLET: Let Fortinbras be the heir, save Horatio to tell my story. SNOT: This is the legend. SNARL: Of a dude who's our homey. SNOT and SNARL: Yo Hamlet is da man with a grievous tragedy! SNOT and SNARL and DJ Shifu: PEACE! The backwall was inspired by the ballroom's arched windows in Kronborg Castle, where Elsinore Castle was based off in Hamlet.


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