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LIU Atlas - Pumilio . There are billions of stars, millions of planets, but there is only one man, Terrance McDoogal. Welcome to LIU Atlas. . LIU Atlas - Pumilio The Ludgonian Industrial Union’s galaxy contains billions of stars and planets. Unfortunately, most residents of the LIU could only name a handful of these worlds. In order to improve astronomy grades across the LIU, TV2 has started a new program called LIU Atlas. Follow our host, Terrance McDoogal, as he takes you on a tour across the LIU and some of its more obscure worlds. Note: This episode is presented in full screen. The corresponding dialogue is underneath each photo. Doog: “Welcome to another episode of LIU Atlas. I’m your host, Terrance “Doog” McDoogal. Today, we’re visiting a large moon called Pumilio. When the warm, wet air from Pumilio’s ocean rises over the moon’s massive mountain chain, it cools, falls as rain, and drenches the land west of the mountains. The land here is wet and muddy, and it is home to a huge forested swamp. The eastern hemisphere, in the mountain chain’s rain shadow, is a dry, desolate wasteland. We, of course, are headed to the forest swamp.” Doog: “The abundance of rain and fertile soils have prompted the growth of extremely large trees. These trees rival skyscrapers in height and width, sometimes reaching over a thousand feet tall. Due to their huge root structures, these trees grow sparsely, often many miles apart from each other. The space in between these wooden monoliths is mostly muddy swamp.” Doog: “The native Pumilions have constructed large habitation rings around these massive trees. This habitation ring has eight docking hangars on its lower decks. That’s where we’re headed.” Skur: “Welcome To Pumilio, Doog. I’m your guide, Skur the IV.” Doog: ‘Aww. Aren’t you just adorable. You want to play guide? Well, I’m sorry little buddy, but Doog needs to get to work. How about you run along a get your dad?” Skur: “Uh, I‘m not a child Doog. But if you insist. Dad!” Skur III: “What is it boy? I’m Grand Poobah of this ring. I don’t have time for this.” Skur IV: “Doog apparently thinks I’m a child.” Skur III: “Typical human. They believe everything in the universe is measured to their standard. Doog, do you have a problem with our small stature?” Doog: “No, no. Of course not. I didn’t know. I…uh…how about we get started?” Doog: “So, where were we?” Skur: “I was introducing myself, and you were talking condescendingly to me.” Doog: “No need to get short with me. Ha ha, get it? Short? Don’t worry, I’ll keep the height insults brief. Ha! Get it? Brief?” Skur: “Sigh. This is going to be a long day…” Doog: “Well, let’s get to it. How about you tell us a little bit about your operations? HA! Get it? Little? I didn’t even try on that one!” Skur: “My species is arboreal in nature, and we have called these ‘mega-trees’ home for many centuries. Despite our small stature, we have been blessed with large brains and a gift for creating technology. Our moon is rife with resources, and we have used our technical know-how to extract these resources. We hope to become an even larger presence within the LIU as our technology progresses.” Doog: “First step…get higher ceilings. My back is killing me!” Skur: “Really? I’m quite comfortable.” Skur: “Before we tour our industries, I figured I’d show you part of the habitation ring’s defense system.” Doog: “I guess I could spare a tiny bit of time. Ha! Get it? Tiny? But yeah, seriously, I’m down for checking out some lasers.” Skur: “Not that kind of defenses Doog. Come with me.” Doog: “What’s this?” Skur: “This is our lightning defense system. Several stations, like this, have been situated around our tree.” Doog: “What? Is lightning trying to take over your moon or something? I don’t get it?” Skur: “No. The downpours that keep this land wet are often accompanied by lightning and thunder. Lightning usually strikes the highest structure in the area, and there’s nothing bigger than this tree for several miles. Lightning can destroy limbs, cause fires, and short out our habitation’s electronics.” Doog: “And this stops it?” Skur: “You can’t stop lightning Doog. This just serves as a better alternative for the lightning to strike. These charged rods attract lightning so it strikes here instead of the tree. This system actually collects the lightning’s electrical discharge and integrates it into our rings power infrastructure.” Doog: “You power your station with lightning?” Skur: “Sort of. Lightning only meets about 1% of our power needs. Lightning strikes are infrequent and unpredictable. We couldn’t depend on it on its own. Besides, most of the energy in lightning is converted into light and heat during the strike, so there’s not much left to use. Let‘s continue.” Skur: “Our main industry on Pumilio is natural gas extraction. Natural gas, primarily methane, is created by decaying vegetation in the swamp. The gas is very prevalent here, and, unlike other hydrocarbons, this ‘biogas’ is renewable, so we’ll always have plenty to collect.” Skur: “The gas is piped from the swamp to our habitation ring. Here, it is processed and placed into tanks. Natural gas has fallen out of favor as a heat source and as a cooking fuel, but it is still very useful in the production of other resources, like ammonia. Using the Haber-process, methane can be converted…” Doog: “Let me just stop you right there. I feel like your about to get scientific on us, and well, no one cares. Not one bit. Bit! Ha! Get it? Because you’re short.” Skur: “Not funny. Get it? Because you’re an idiot.” Doog: “Gee, I’m just kidding. Lighten up. I didn’t mean to slight you. Ha! Get it?” Skur: “Sigh. Let’s continue.” Skur: “The biggest obstacle to gas extraction is the environment. My arboreal species is not suited for life on the forest floor. We solved this problem with a little genetic ingenuity. This is Lab C-35, our genetics lab.” Skur: “To extract gas, we need access to the ground, but it’s just too dangerous for my species.” Doog: “Because you’re tiny?” Skur: “No! Because of predators! And mud! And other things unrelated to height!” Doog: “Oh.” Skur: “We also needed access to the nearby mountains to extract ore, but our bodies were ill adapted to the cold. To achieve these seemingly impossible tasks, we altered our DNA and created two sub-species of our race: the Underlings and the Upperlings. The Underlings are better suited for the swamp forest floor, and the Upperlings are better suited for life in the mountains.” Skur: “Here, you can see scientists experimenting with various DNA combinations. Although we’ve created two sub-species successfully, we’re not finished yet. We hope to eventually find combinations that will allow us to populate the desert wasteland in the eastern hemisphere.” Skur: “If you’re up for it, I figured I’d introduce you to these sub-species.” Doog: “Sure. I have a little bit of time. Get it? Little? Wait…I already used that one.” Skur: “Yes, I believe you have used them all by now. Now, in order to safely visit the swamp and the mountains, you’ll need to wear an oxygen mask. The controlled atmosphere in the ring is safe, but the methane levels outside are high enough where asphyxiation is a risk. Come with me.” Skur: “As you can see, I’ve arranged a security detail. This is our Rhino-Mantis Quad Walker. Its four legs allow it to handle the muddy terrain with ease. It is armed with two blaster rifles, but they are for emergency use only. Discharging energy weapons is a last resort in a methane filled atmosphere. Its primary weapons are the melee spikes on its arms and head.” Doog: “Protection from the predators?” Skur: “Yes. As well as the Underlings. We wouldn’t want them to rise up and become the dominant sub-species.” Doog: “Tell me more about the Underlings.” Skur: “Life is much harder here in the swamps. We needed a variation of our species that was much stronger, more durable, and well, larger.” Underling: “You summoned me, my liege?” Skur: “Yes, just stand there and be quiet for a moment.” Underling: “Ok.” Doog: “Wow, he’s big!” Skur: “Yes. This is an Underling. They are quite the physical specimen, although they lack much of the intelligence that the original Pumilions enjoy. The Underlings are our swamp laborers. They are responsible for digging gas wells, maintaining the gas pipelines, and farming. Underling! Take us to your village.” Doog: “So, do you have a name?” Underling: “No name.” Doog: “Ok, I see this is going to be an interesting interview. So, you, what do you guys do here.” Underling: “Whatever is commanded of me. Mostly dig. Tighten pipes. Avoid the big fire booms.” Doog: “Wow, top shelf stuff. Thanks for your time.” Doog: “Wow! They really did make everything bigger. Look at the melons on her!” Underling: “Hey! That my sister! Next pipe I tighten will be windpipe of yellow man.” Doog: “Skur!” Skur: “That’s enough. Underling! Take us to the farm.” Skur: “My species used to have to return to the forest floor to farm. Now, we mustn’t take that risk; the Underlings do it for us. Many of the forest swamp plants are edible, including the delicious Pumilio Potato.” Underling: “Look! He pull yellow round food up. It makes me think of yellow man’s head. I pull it up soon.” Doog: “Skur!” One hour later Doog: “Alright folks, we’ve flown to Pumilio’s mountainous area east of the swamp. What do we have here Skur?” Skur: “These are the Upperlings. They’ve been genetically modified to survive the cold conditions here.” Skur: “They’ve also been modified to see better in the dark mines where they spend most of their time.” Doog: “Mines?” Skur: “Yes. Since we’ve created the Upperlings, we’ve been able to begin mining the mountain chain. They mine metal ore that we use to make gas tanks, pipes, mechas, and whatever else we need. It lowers our dependence on other worlds and increases our profits. The LIU likes this.” Doog: “What’s this down here?” Skur: “Ah, yes. The Upperlings also tend to our carnivorous needs by raising herds of Pumilion Dwarf Rams.” Doog: “Haha. Dwarf! Get it? Man, I’ve had quite a few laughs today. Thanks for the tour.” Skur: “Whatever jerk…” Doog: “Well folks, Pumilio is an interesting place. It’s too bad we were so short on time. I would have loved to spend a little more time here. Just a tiny bit more. Just a few more minutes.” Skur: “STOP IT!” Doog: “See ya!” Note: Doog: “Leave a review. It’s a small thing to ask. Ha! Get it?”


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