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Shannonia expanding northward - part 2 . 'Cause I'm a fool for the city... fool for the city... . In which all those new buildings you got a tantalizing glimpse of in the previous installment get their time in the limelight... If you can afford it, these beautiful beach houses along Shannonia's famed North Shore are available to rent... nah, never mind, you probably can't afford it. Econo-Room motel. Who needs amenities? With all the stuff to do and see in town, it's not like you'll be spending a lot of time in your room, right? Especially with the rat problem they have here -- but you didn't hear that from me. Shannonia has grown so large now that I don't have room to take a proper photograph of the whole thing all at once (by "proper" I mean a clean white background with no outside noise). Since the city isn't getting any smaller, this is a problem that needs to be addressed in the future. Donatello La Vinci's giant fish statue, affectionately known as "Sherman" by the locals. Mmmmm... cultural. For decades, Shannonia's economy was based almost solely on harvesting the local giant catfish. (We had to switch to tourism when they were fished to extinction.) Whether this piece is meant to honor the brave fishermen lost at sea or the unfortunate fish itself, La Vinci never said. Like all great Art, you are free to make your own interpretation. The Green Hotel, catering to the environmental crowd. Powered entirely by an infinitely renewable resource: bad Halo builders. The hotel staff kidnaps W4R7H0G-building n00bs and runs them to death in big hamster wheels in the basement, to power the generators. But for each one taken off the street, two more seem to appear to take his place. Merrimac Bay Interpretive Center. Because you can't have a national park without some boring educational crap to punish the kids with. I think Shannonia's national flag is striped -- stripes made of grill tiles, of course. Flotsam's -- jars full of little seashells, driftwood sculptures, tacky overpriced T-shirts, stuffed seagulls, all that crap. Lookout Tower. It's not all that high, but the three levels of concourses offer unparalleled views north and west out to sea, and inland over the woods in Merrimac Bay National Park. Plus you can lean over the railings and spit on people below. A once-in-a-century, freakishly low tide has exposed these sandbars which would ordinarily be submerged at all times... meteorologists predict the phenomenon will persist until the Mayor procures some more blue tiles. Roy's Natural Market. Catering to both the rich folk who rent out the beach houses and the eco-freaks who stay in the Green Hotel, everything sold here has the words "organic" or "all-natural" on it, so naturally they charge twice as much for it. Midnight Ravers -- the ultimate club, with 8 different dance floors of deafening music and disorienting light shows! Just stay away from the brown acid... or ecstacy, or whatever pill you crazy kids are popping these days when you want to party. The Star Wars Really Isn't All That Great building. Because I just realized I've been ripping on Halo quite a bit in these two northward expansions, and Star Wars has so far gotten off scot-free. On average I think Star Wars MOCs tend to be of higher quality than Halo ones, but I try to be an equal-opportunity hater. Once I've determined that I can allow myself back on Bricklink, I'm going to get a ton of 2x2 blue tiles and redo Shannonia's entire ocean so it's all nice clean squares, like latitude and longitude lines on a map. And I'll need more 1x2s and 1x1s to fill in the gaps around the shoreline, not to mention all the other pieces I'll need for further expansions... I should have just started a heroin habit instead. It probably would have been cheaper, and less addictive. While the Pancake Hut is most famous for its pancakes (duh), you can always get whatever kind of drunk food that you feel best soaks up the poisons you were putting into your system the night before. And if you aren't done abusing your poor liver, their Bloody Marys are the best in the city. Pill Poppers, a subsidiary of the Institute. Patrons of Midnight Ravers looking for something to keep them dancing til dawn can find it here. Also, unlucky gamblers in need of some quick cash can volunteer to test the latest experimental drugs cooked up by the Institute's mad scientists. Everybody wins! Shannonia has never seen a clear sky -- it's always overcast but never rains, a true meteorological oddity. This makes the warm, deep blue waters of the Shannonian Sea that much more inviting. The Sheepdip Club, for the finest in Australian cuisine and culture. Barbecued 'roo, emu burgers, vegemite and cheese sandwiches... on the bright side, they play a lot of AC/DC. And Men At Work, of course: "Traveling in a fried-out combie... on a hippie trail, head full of zombie..." The Chunderdome -- obviously I've still got Australia on the brain. Here, slavering new wave punks from post-apocalyptic biker gangs fight to the death with rusty chains and lead pipes, all for your amusement -- you sick freak. The Shannonia UFO Museum. I've been to the International UFO Museum and Research Center in Roswell, New Mexico. Sadly, the name is the most impressive thing about it. Walking down Main Street in Roswell is pretty fun though, the streetlamps look like alien heads, and every shop window has some sort of alien in it. Anyway, I found the museum there very disappointing, so I imagine mine here to be very cool and interesting. Plus it's right on the beach. Next up in the Chronicles of Shannonia: a southern expansion. I don't know exactly when that will be, but it's coming. Keep your passports up to date -- these things usually happen when you least expect them.


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